Okay men...I need your help! Imagine that

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Corpsie I	Okay men...I need your help! Imagine that		Lead	[-]
Posts: 5885 06/27/08 10:47 AM	I have this sprinkler stuck/welded on my hose and I've been trying to get it off for about a week now. I even had my brother in-law try to get it off. (I was getting desperate) I've use WD 40, Lithium grease, and of course ever tool known to man. It's not corroded or rusted, but I am gonna poor coke or baking soda on it. Maybe both. Do ya'll have any suggestions on how to get the darn thing off? The next step is to cut the damn thing off and fix the hose....which I'm pretty sure I can't do either. LOL HELP!!!!!! I can't tell you how bad I hate to admit that ya'll do come in handy sometimes......don't get overly excited because I said that, I'm just humoring you until you help get this thing off my hose...then you all will return to shit again. LOL "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
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moldman7n		#1	[url]	[-]
Posts: 254 06/27/08 2:28 PM	Vise grips, got any? You'll need two.
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Corpsie I		#2	[url]	[-]
Posts: 5885 06/27/08 3:56 PM	I doubt if I have two pair of them or the muscle to use them effectively. I'll try it and see if it works. Thanks very much Moldman. I was hoping you could tell me about some way to do it without requiring my muscles. I'll let you know if it works. "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
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Widgetsniper		#3	[url]	[-]
Posts: 960 06/27/08 11:58 PM	These are the kinds of problems I pay my gardener to fix. I detest soiling my hands with unclean farming implements. Good luck. Widge
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Corpsie I		#4	[url]	[-]
Posts: 5885 06/28/08 12:11 AM	These are the kinds of problems I pay my gardener to fix. I detest soiling my hands with unclean farming implements. Damn Widge, I didn't ask how to fix the tractor or the barn door. I do live in the city and I don't want to soil my hands either, which is why I ask how to get it off, and if I mess up my manicure Moldman dies. LOL. Thanks for your imput Widge...think you could send your gardener down to Texas? "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
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The Balloon Artist		#5	[url]	[-]
Posts: 474 06/28/08 12:17 AM	Be over in about an hour.
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Corpsie I		#6	[url]	[-]
Posts: 5885 06/28/08 12:26 AM	That's right you not far from me are you? Well come on over...this thing is about to win. I thought about just running over it with my car or taking a hammer to it. "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
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The Balloon Artist		#7	[url]	[-]
Posts: 474 06/28/08 12:28 AM	A new hose costs about $5.
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Corpsie I		#8	[url]	[-]
Posts: 5885 06/28/08 12:35 AM	It's the nozzle that was expensive. It just didn't say on the packaging that it would require a grenade to remove. I think I'll just take my neighbors hose tonight....I think they are out of town. Unless you know where I can pick up some grenades. "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
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moldman7n		#9	[url]	[-]
Posts: 254 06/28/08 1:40 AM	Corpsie, work gloves will protect that manicure. You still could break a nail though. Maybe you could use this hose for the sprinkler only and buy a new one for everything else? I don't want to die yet. lol
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SuZanBare		#10	[url]	[-]
Posts: 936 06/28/08 1:45 AM	Spit on it wink BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety-one?
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OldBikerDude		#11	[url]	[-]
Posts: 1062 06/28/08 7:18 AM	Hell.......just put on something skimpy, stand around the yard acting all helpless. Some of us "good ole' boys, just live for rescuing a damsel in distress.......... Life is Too Short.............. to Spend it Pissed Off.
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The Balloon Artist		#12	[url]	[-]
Posts: 474 06/28/08 7:44 AM	That damsel in distress gig gets old.
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Corpsie I		#13	[url]	[-]
Posts: 5885 06/28/08 8:02 AM	Moldman is getting skeered of me.....if I break a nail he is dead meat and he knows it. Bal-loonie dude you best stick with balloon creatures, it is apparent you know nothing about women or hoses. Psst....... I've used the damsel in distress act for years and it works every time. I mastered in damsel in distress 101 and I'm now teaching a course in it. Good idea Suzan!!!!! I knew a woman would eventually come along and give me some sound advice that will probably work, is free and doesn't require a man. All I needed to do was spit in it and wink. Sheesh!!!! I should have just ask Suzan in the first place. You men will have me opening a house of ill-repute just to get the nozzle off my hose. "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
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The Balloon Artist		#14	[url]	[-]
Posts: 474 06/28/08 8:22 AM	I learned a lot about hose when I worked in the oilfield in subfreezing weather. Only men smilin' was wearin' 'em. Women: they really need commitment.
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Corpsie I		#15	[url]	[-]
Posts: 5885 06/28/08 8:25 AM	And your point is? I also teach a class called how to hog tie a man and drag him home. The next course is how to drive him crazy in 10 days or less. "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
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The Balloon Artist		#16	[url]	[-]
Posts: 474 06/28/08 8:28 AM	10 days or less. You must be contagious.
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Corpsie I		#17	[url]	[-]
Posts: 5885 06/28/08 8:31 AM	Is that why people keep spraying me? "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
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The Balloon Artist		#18	[url]	[-]
Posts: 474 06/28/08 8:38 AM	10 days or less? Are you my sister in law?
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Corpsie I		#19	[url]	[-]
Posts: 5885 06/28/08 8:41 AM	I probably am......20 days at the most. Did I say I have a Masters degree in it too? "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
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The Balloon Artist		#20	[url]	[-]
Posts: 474 06/28/08 8:44 AM	I take it you divorce well.
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